Perfection Is Overrated
by Bradley Scott
“Wow, have you tried this bacon? It is SO not as black as charcoal or as hard as boot leather.” Darren winked.
“I said I was sorry, okay?” Kyle pouted. “How was I supposed to watch the bacon when I was busy taking care of the eggs?”
“But… you burnt the eggs too.”
“BECAUSE I was BUSY trying to stop the bacon from setting the house on fire!”
Darren laughed, and pecked Kyle quickly on the cheek. Kyle had almost set the kitchen on fire while he was trying to make breakfast. Ted had just left, saying something about grabbing his own breakfast at the cafe around the corner, and “not wanting to be around for the disaster”. Kyle had panicked when everything started burning and the toaster caught fire, but he didn’t want to call Ted for help, just because he’d be smug. Darren came running through, and like a hero, had grabbed the fire extinguisher, which Kyle didn’t even know was there, and put out the fire, then turned off the stove plates.
After that, Kyle phoned out for some breakfast to be delivered.
“It’s okay. It’s the thought that counts…”
“Thank you.” Kyle smiled and kissed Darren softly on the lips.
“…And you definitely THOUGHT you were cooking.” Darren chuckled.
“HEY!” Kyle poked Darren in the ribs. Darren doubled over.
“Stop it! You’re going to make me choke.” He was trying hard to swallow his food and not laugh.
“Oooh, but then I’d have to give you CPR.” Kyle leaned in towards Darren. “And that’d be awesome.”
“You know, there are easier ways of kissing me than waiting for me to stop breathing.”
“Really? Like what?”
“Pretty please? With a cherry on top?”
“I’ll consider it.” Darren grinned, and began to kiss Kyle. Kyle grabbed him, and pulled him back on to the couch. They lay there making out for a while.
“Wait,” Darren pulled back. “Our food’s getting cold.”
“It’s okay, I’ll heat it up.”
“Oh, god, please, NO! DON’T! Please!” Darren smiled.
“Hey! I do know how to use the microwave.” Kyle scowled with indignation.
“Are you sure?”
“A monkey could do it.”
“Well, in that case, I guess you’re a perfect candidate.” Darren smiled.
“Ha… ha. Anyway, what do you want to do today?” Kyle sat up.
“I don’t know. What do you usually do?”
“On Sundays? Recover from Saturday night, usually. And chase out the random guy who’s ended up in my bed.” Kyle thought a moment. “And not set the house on fire. Yup, that’s my regular Sunday morning. But I’m sensing all of those are no longer options.”
“But…” Kyle looked tentative. “We could… go see a movie together, if you’d like.”
“Um, yeah… but only if you want.”
“I’d love to.” Darren smiled widely.
“Me too.” Kyle grinned from ear to ear.
Darren loved the way his face always showed what he was feeling. He didn’t like people you couldn’t read. Luke was like that.
Darren looked away quickly, and tried to shift his mind to something else.
“So what movie do you think we should go see?”
“Um…” Kyle thought. “I don’t know what’s out. We’re not actually going to watch it though.”
“No, we’re going to make out and freak out the straight people.”
“Oh, it so is. I used to do it with my boyfriend back in high school. Well, when I had one. And it was a small town, so most of the other people in the movie were from our school.”
“Ah…. Wasn’t that dangerous?”
“Er… Kinda. A few homophobes always wanted to beat us up. Mostly guys who didn’t know me. But we were both pretty buff and he did karate. We only got into like three fights, and we came out best in all of them. And we dated for like four months, and we went to a lot of movies.”
“Oh, um, sounds…cool.”
“It was. He was awesome. It wasn’t like ‘dating’ dating, you know.”
“What was it like?”
“Like best friends. Who fooled around. Actually, that’s pretty much exactly what it was…..” Kyle frowned, deep in thought. “He got a girlfriend, and dumped me, eventually.”
“Wow. That sucks.” Darren put his arm over Kyle’s shoulder.
“Eh, it wasn’t too bad. I knew he was only doing it for fun. You know, the sex was great, and us being so public pissed people off, which is something I think he enjoyed even more. He picked loads of fights on his own. Bit of a violent sociopath, in my opinion.” Kyle winked at Darren and laughed.”I didn’t blame him for dumping me though. And he wasn’t mean about it or anything. We… sort of stayed friends afterwards.”
“Yeah…. you know. He was hanging out with his girlfriend, I was out doing other-“
“Other THINGS. We just didn’t spend a lot of time together anymore after that. And it’s not like we talked a lot – even when we were going out, we didn’t really spend much time talking about . . .”
“I’ll bet.” Darren smirked.
“I’m trying to tell a story here.”
“I know, and I’m providing commentary.”
“Gee, thanks.” Kyle rolled his eyes and sighed dramatically.
“You’re very welcome. Please, continue.” Darren smiled.
“So yeah, we sort of drifted apart. And I haven’t spoken to him in years. It’d just be too weird to start now. I think he’s even married. To the same girl he left me for.”
“Already? Was he our age?”
“Couple of years older. I was about fifteen, and I think he was eighteen.”
“That’s still strange though. He married a girl? And twenty-one is still kind of young for that, these days.”
“Yeah, Kyle looked thoughtful.
Kyle smiled. “It was Gary.”
“So, um,” Darren shifted uneasily. “Do you keep in touch with your other ex-boyfriends?”
“I haven’t actually had another one, since him.” Kyle slid his hand into Darren’s. “Do you wanna go out and see that movie now? And freak out the straight people by making out?”
“I really do.” Darren grinned lazily while Kyle got up. He held out his hand and Kyle pulled him to his feet.
“Well that was no fun.” Kyle pouted and put his hands in his pockets as they walked out of the cinema.
“Awe, come on. It wasn’t a bad movie. And we still got to make out.”
“I know, . . ., but no one was looking at us! Everyone kept staring at that fat midget couple.”
“Well, they did make a lot more noise than we did.” Darren chuckled.
Kyle just pouted harder. Two really short, fat people had been sitting in the front row, practically making short, fat babies right there in the theatre. No one had even glanced at him and Darren while they were making out.
“It’s not fair.”
“Oh, come on. Don’t be such a scene queen. We can go make out in the park? Or we could go home and . . .” Darren grinned mischievously.
“Home! Definitely home.” Kyle grabbed Darren’s hand and hopped on spot. “Let’s grab a cab.”
“No, come on, it’s such a nice day. Let’s walk. You know, like a warm up.”
“Okay, fine. Let’s go.” Kyle set off briskly down the sidewalk.
Kyle kept walking fast, but every couple of seconds he’d see that Darren wasn’t next to him. So he’d stop and sigh loudly, and wait for Darren to catch up.
“Come on-n-n-n-n! Can’t you walk any quicker.” Kyle prodded Darren in the ribs.
Darren pushed Kyle away and smiled.
“But it’s so much more fun hanging back and watching you bounce around like a kid who desperatley needs to pee.”
“I desperately need to do something, alright.” Kyle leaned in and whispered in Darren’s ear “Something hot and sweaty.”
“Oh, would you just, . . ., oh, shit.” Darren grabbed Kyle and shoved him into the nearest open door. They were in a bookshop.
Books?, Kyle thought. Suuuure, that’s sexy, . . ., NOT. What the hell is Darren doing?
He looked up at Darren, and saw that he was looking at some guy who was walking past outside.
He was kind of cute. Nothing amazing though. But good enough for a little bit of fun, Kyle supposed. Highlights in his hair, kinda skinny, designer eye-glasses. He set Kyle’s gaydar off big-time. He looked back at Darren’s face, but he couldn’t quite tell what he was thinking.
They stood there in silence and watched the guy pass.
“Who was that?” Kyle asked Darren.
Darren said nothing. He looked lost in a memory, or something. The expression on his face made Kyle want to hug him.
“An ex-boyfriend?” Kyle said, shaking Darren gently.
“Oh, sorry. No. Not an ex-boyfriend, He’s . . .” Darren sighed. “I really don’t want to talk about it, okay?”
“Are you sure, . . .”
“I said I don’t want to talk about it! Okay?”
Kyle was surprised by the sudden outburst. Okay, Kyle thought, touchy subject. He was one person who knew when to leave well enough alone.
“Okay, gee, sorry. Should we . . . just go?”
“Um, yeah, okay. Sorry, . . ., I didn’t mean, . . ., Can we just go?” Darren looked like he was on the verge of tears.
“It’s fine. Yeah, let’s just go.” Kyle gently took Darrens hand, and led him back out onto the street.
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